Lately I notice little things that friends have, things that cost 2 to 5 hundred dollars. I am always amazed that they have it, that they bought it. Whatever it is. These are not frivolities, for them, these are things they use. But, I have this strange 'child behind christmas window glass' feeling about the idea of myself having such things.
I realized yesterday that Mr. S and I have grown so accustomed to an IF related 'money lockdown' that any expenditure beyond food, mortgage (basic necessities) seems like an extravagance. We haven't had a real(read not staying at friend/family) vacation in years. Mr. S has FIVE weeks of vacation time saved up! We even avoid going out to movies. It is a bit ridiculous. The current downturn, people tightening their belts, etc. feels all too familiar to us.
For the past 2 1/2 yrs we've been shelling out anywhere between $1000(IUI) to $10,000 (IVF) on a mildly regular basis. No wonder I can't imagine owning an ipod, iphone, new computer (new roof).
We'll be paying this IVF off for another 16 months, but in the meantime, we may have some money (hello tax return after major health care expenses) coming our way.
Neither of us is prepared to dream of being truly beyond paying(constantly) for our infertility. Of wondering how much the next treatment will be. But, for now, I am pregnant. If we are lucky, we'll have something else to put our money to.
I hit seven weeks Sunday. I am excited!
I've had on and off nausea for about a week now, the only let-up is when I eat, or (oddly) this weekend, when I had a terrible cold.
In money dreaming meantime, I was just mailed a catalogue of computers. I am using a hand-me-down laptop that is 6 yrs old. I am starting to dream of a newer computer. No more frozen screens. ....
New Adventures
8 years ago
Oh, Poppy, my heart goes out to you and Mr.S on how much you have sacrificed to have a chance at a dream of family.
ReplyDeleteYeah for 7 weeks!
You are one week and one day ahead of me and my inspiration!!
ReplyDeleteHappy 7 weeks!
What an absolute relief to read your latest posts! I've been feeling like NO ONE has gotten pregnant recently with IVF. I'm SO thrilled for you and wish you all the luck in the world with your pregnancy.
ReplyDeleteI started Lupron today for IVF 2 1/2 - I hoping and praying for all sorts of dumb luck this time around.
And thanks for stopping by my blog. It's nice to "meet" you.
Money woes. I am so sorry! Happy to hear of your 7 weeks!! YIPPPEE!!!
ReplyDeleteICLW
www.ttc-wildride.blogspot.comn
we were talking about money yesterday as well. I know what it is like to live on with only the basics. Luckily our health plan does cover IF treatments though, but we also don't feel comfortable buying expensive stuff.
ReplyDeleteCongrats on your seven weeks. It must be an incredible feeling.
Surreal, isn't it, how our perspective changes. I too see personal expenses as extravagent, but medical expenses as just a way of life. Hoping you get to put $$ into other things soon, like baby slings, car seat, swingset, etc.
ReplyDeletePoppy, thank you for all the beautiful comments you have left on my blog during these past few weeks. Each one meant so much to me as I was struggling with the BFN, and trying to gather the courage for IVF/ICSI #2.
ReplyDeleteI've also just read a really helpful comment you left on Chelle's blog about doing a PIO if you're pg and experiencing heavy cramping and spotting. I'll tuck that little useful piece of advice away in case I ever need it.
I hear you on all the financial sacrifices. We're in the same boat, and I'm stunned by ppl who are only now waking up to a more responsible way of living, since we've been sacrificing for so long to go through IVF.
So happy for you that you've reached the 7 week mark. Awesome!! My ER went well today - 13 eggs! Hopefully I'll be in your shoes 7 weeks from Thursday. :)
Congrats on your pregnancy!! So wonderful.
ReplyDeleteAnd I can definitely relate to your money post...we haven't started treatments yet, but have been saving money. There are so many things we would love to do with our house that are on hold indefinitely...as well as vacations...but it is so encouraging to read that you are pregnant! :)
ICLW
makingmemom.blogspot.com
Seriously, I am so there with you on the money thing. We don't even go out for frozen yogurt or movies anymore. Over the weekend we were with a group of close friends..one preparing for a trip to Jordan/Dubai then Easter skiing in Switzerland, another friend heading to France/Italy and just booked a Mexico cruise for Thanksgiving. We've never been in their league, but usually could talk about a weekend getaway or day trip. Now, it's just pitiful. Um, maybe I should talk about the FABULOUS new Lupron I got last month!!
ReplyDeleteMy garden is growing like crazy, and tonight I posted a photo of our snapdragons on my blog (I thought of you as I took it!).
Congratulations on 7 weeks!!
Hello from ICLW!
ReplyDeleteI remember the nausea, oooohhh the dreaded nausea!! I remember how it only eased when I was actually chewing a swallowing ;-) - I made sure I had a box of water biscuits to hand at all times to help with just this thing!
I hope that the nausea continues in a normal and tedious manner :-)
VP
Baby = Priceless :)
ReplyDeleteCongrats on your pregnancy
Yay 7 weeks!
ReplyDeleteAnd I hear you on the money. I have friends who have tons of little gadgets that we don't, and I don't get it. Yet, we were looking at fertility treatment and adoption, nad yikes on the expenses there.
ICLW
congratulations on your pregnancy!
ReplyDeletei have to admit, i fortunately live in a state where you are required to have medical insurance and insurance is required to cover infertility. i am just beginning my own IF journey, but it is such a relief that money does not factor in to our decisions.
i'm sure you will have much more exciting things to save up for now that you have a baby on the way!
ICLW
congrats on being 7 weeks! I hope you get to start dreaming big real soon!
ReplyDeleteICLW