The joys of Insurance

Our insurance won't cover and IF stuff, but once you are pregnant, they'll cover meds. But only after days of 'awaiting approval.' And only with very specific pharmacies. I hate them.

I have been on the phone with the approved pharmacy 8 times(between Friday and today) and EVERY time I have to say my info, all of it, name, address, birth date. And had to answer inane questions such as "has your info changed?" and I have said, "I just signed up with you Friday, why would it change?" "We have to ask you, ma'am." Today, a person said, "we don't have your info." I almost lost it.

After much being put on hold and getting close to tears of rage, they are sending the PIO, a day later than I need it, but I have some crinone to hold me over. Honestly, I was so annoyed that I felt like I'd rather pay full price than deal with their crap.

After all of the frustration, I opened my front door and tried to breathe in some cool fresh air and remind myself that things are going well.

I am pregnant, and their idiocy shouldn't effect me.

a new (temporary) focus

For 2 years, a lot of my online time has been spent on TTC websites, researching Male Factor Infertility, and connecting with others on this IF journey.

Due to economic downturn(and my having lost 2 teaching jobs- I piece together things, normally) I am now having a different type of obsessive online activity and direction for daydreams.

Lately, the ttc website/researching has been replaced by job-hunting, cover letter writing, resume restructuring.

In a way, it makes sense that my focus would change a little, how much can you daydream about a natural surprise pregnancy, after failed IVF and miscarriage?

The only fun part: imagining myself in jobs that may be fun, or may lead to a couple of things:
1. me having disposable income, something that hasn't happened in years. --vacations again! to dream, to hope.
2. us having IF (or a little)insurance coverage, and thereby increasing 1.
3. the quieter hope, imagining having a job from which I would have maternity leave, something my contract teaching would never give me! And using that maternity leave!

Yesterday, I got home from my last day of college classes to an interview request. I would be an edu.cation coo.rdinator at a local ar.boretum. It would be VERY cool(I think)... Let the daydreams begin. And, serendipitously, had a lecture to attend that night, about gardening in the city, for wildlife.

Pests: crabgrass and insurance

Well, I spoke too soon about getting to stop PIO shots. Apparently, my insurance won't pay unless the Dr. calls/faxes them directly. They are so paranoid about covering anything infertility related, that none of our treatments/meds have been covered, even when it could be for something else. I hate them. Approval usually takes 48-72 hrs after they get the note from the Dr. So, I ordered more PIO. It has gotten to the point where it hurts and stings the entire time I get the shot, every night. I've heard this happens to other people. I would complain to my nurse/Dr. but what is the point, since I am being switched anyway?

The garden became a grassy jungle these last 3 weeks. I had been trying to take it easy from transfer day on, and let it all grow wild. (although it was a but jungly already), but since my RE gave me the OK for moderate/mild exercise I thought I'd take advantage of the cool morning, and the fact that I am not teaching today.

Crab grass had grown in amongst my tomatoes/okra/jalepenos. If you don't know what crabgrass it is, let me tell you. It is a tough grass that sends out thick, woody runners, sideways, and its blades are rough and not lush. I never knew it also grows up, but now I do, some of it had threaded up some tomato supports, over 2 feet high! It is hard to pull out(tough and strong) but VERY satisfying. I have a nice large pile to take back to compost.

I sat and weeded and felt calmer about all these meds and waiting. Just 5 days until my ultrasound. Grow and thrive, babies! Acorn and pumpkin; sunflower and moonflower; babyfishes.