Since our little Acorn was born, I have been working very part-time. Overall, I love it, as I get out of the house 2x a week and get to talk to adults and pee when I want to, even for just a couple of hours. Plus, b/c of working pt, I get lots of time to watch Acorn develop and grow. Sometimes people ask me how I managed to get my job to let me work pt and I laugh, as there were major budget cuts right before Acorn was born, and I wasn't given any choice. For about 6 months now I've known I'd like to work a tad more(for money, for 'time to myself').. But, it isn't so easy to find more part-time work(or even good ft work) in my field. And, I have student loans on major deferral which need to be paid. With that in mind, I've been applying for FT jobs(some in my old field, more marketable) for about 6 months(only 1-2 a month, nothing crazy) and I keep getting to the 2nd round and then not making it further, or having the job disappear b/c of budget cuts. Argh!
There are days I feel like a failure, for being unable to find work, it can be unbelievably disheartening. I also get angry with myself for taking loans out to study such an unprofitable(financially) discipline.
Today I had a talk with a fellow mom that gave me some perspective. Without going into great detail about her own life, she is facing the end of her marriage and the end of her savings, and is on state health care. Trying to find a way to work and stay with her son.
My debt is no small thing, but it made me grateful for what I do have, a loving husband, health insurance(crappy high deductible, but there(, pt work and time with my Acorn.
And, she is 18 months old today and I feel so lucky to be a parent to this smart, fiesty, dancing girl. I am trying to maintain perspective and hold hope that there will be good work for me, paid work, soon, and that, in the meantime, I have this unpaid and highly rewarding work, during this fleeting toddler time.
New Adventures
8 years ago
I am seriously concerned what we are going to do when my mat leave benefits run out. I'm currently trying to find something that I can do from home (that isn't babysitting!) that makes a decent amount.
ReplyDeleteOf course we are also praying the Beloved gets the call from Jeopardy and that he wins big! :)
What a beautiful entry. I think people enter our life's path for a reason. So neat you were able to gather such good perspective on your situation based on your visit with another mom. Cheers to counting our blessings everyday Poppy! Happy Mother's Day!
ReplyDeleteBirch,
ReplyDeleteTotally understandable to feel so frustrated at the unavailability of decently paid work in your field; if they can't hire YOU, as talented and multi-skilled as you are, then they must be in some kind of crisis! Have you been able to get any feedback from the interviewers around what bumped you/made them choose another candidate?
I have confidence that there is interesting, well paid work out there for you- just keep looking and applying when it seems right. And keep writing! And keep being a fabulous person, mother, and wife! (sounds busy;-)