Thursday, October 2, 2008

deflating the helium

I went for an acupuncture treatment yesterday. I had a good talk with my practitioner. I told him that I am having(still) moments where I feel like I am floating. Not grounded at all. According to him, I am usually quite grounded(energy speaking). He said that he wanted to work on grounding me some, as (quote) "walking around full of helium can be dangerous"
I would agree, I find myself having to pay extra attention when driving, and when shopping. I am spacey in a way I have seen other people be, but never been myself.

So, he did the Seven Dragons treatment on me. He did this treatment 2 yrs ago, before we had found out we were dealing with male factor, to remove any old emotional blockages that could've been keeping us from conceiving. It was very powerful. This time around I talked less(this treatment is different than most, the practitioner stays in the room with you, so you can process stuff) but it still felt powerful.

During the treatment I realized just how constrained by money I am feeling. I want to move on, get ready to start IVF again, and that is just not possible. So, my days are spent searching and applying for jobs. When I have the energy. I do not enjoy it, at all, as I know I am only applying to these jobs to get some kind of IF coverage.

In the meantime, I teach 2 days a week. I love being in the classroom and wish it wasn't so hard to find FT college work.


  1. Seven dragons is so intense!! Very, very powerful though. I'm glad that you have this kind of support. I've been thinking of you lots. Will we see you at Mari and Jeff's reception this weekend?

  2. I know when I'm grieving and emotionally shellshocked that I feel unhinged to the concrete ties of daily functioning. I'm proud of you for taking care of yourself. I am sorry you are being held back by money. I wish it wasn't hard to get IF coverage or teaching work. Thinking of you both.

  3. I'm sorry you're in a situation where you need more work but aren't interested in getting it. I've been there, I'm still there, and it's very soul draining.

    I'm glad you have acupuncture to help you with some of this. I hope you can get the resources you need soon for an IVF.

  4. Wow, that 7 Dragons treatment sounds intense. I'm glad it provides you a way to get some things out. How difficult to be applying for jobs just for IVF coverage. Honestly, if that was an option for me, I'd probably do it too.