Grandparents present and future

My parents are about to be grandparents. They are both excited. And, I am looking forward to seeing how they change/act as grandparents. It is interesting, because Mr. S's parents have been grandparents since I met them.
I have only one set of grandparents that I think of when I think of the idea of grandparents: my maternal ones. I admit that I base a lot of my ideas on grandparent-hood on them and their behavior. Ideas about support, guidance, fun, acceptance.
It has been odd(for me) over the years to see Mr. S's Mom and how permissive she can be with her grandchildren- giving soda and sugar to a 2 1/2 yr old, suggesting the child go watch tv, etc. It is something Mr. S and I have talked about, and hope to avoid with our own child. She is also incredibly loving, loyal and supportive, so we know the good outweighs the negative(what we see as negative)...
But, we know there is a lack of control, of what we can expect(like that she not leave crime
shows on when the baby/toddler is in the room), and a fine line of expectation versus action.

My Mom smokes, never around me, but she reeks of it. She gave me two hand-crocheted blankets yesterday, one for the baby, so pretty. They are outside airing out before I wash them. I need to broach the subject of her airing out the house before she watches our baby, which she will probably do about 4 hrs a week. She is so excited to watch our baby. I asked her what she wants to do, if she has any activites, and she says she can't wait to read lots of books to the baby, and go on walks in the park. That is sweet.

I ran into my cousin at the store yesterday(married to my Aunt's son) she said my Aunt watched her daughter at around 8 months and was so worried about the cloth diaper/strange sippy cup thing(klea.n kanteen) that she didn't give her granddaughter milk all day, and used a nice salad bowl to soak the diapers in, even though she'd been told where to put the diapers. Sounds like the stress goes both ways!

So, we have the interesting dilemma of knowing what we hope won't happen. But, we are both looking forward to the expanding love in the family. It is exciting.